Embracing the Suck

Elite military forces have this saying. You should “embrace the suck”. It means you should delight in pain. In doing hard things. Stressing your body and pushing it beyond what is thought capable.

They’re right.

David Goggins, a retired Navy SEAL and ultra-endurance athlete, talks about pushing yourself to expand your limits on the Andrew Huberman podcast. Here is a short clip (apologies for some foul language):

Society constrains us. We’re always afraid of making a mistake. Hurting ourselves. Doing something that others will see as a reason to make fun of us.

So we hold back. We don’t try. We don’t push ourselves. We take the easy way out.

“Don’t exercise - you might hurt yourself.”

“That’s some weird stuff you’re eating. Can’t you just eat what everyone else is having?”

“Let’s get together at the bar. We haven’t seen each other in a while. It would be great to have a few drinks and reminisce.”

I realize this is a hard message to deliver just before the Holiday season. We all like to take it easy at this time. Indulge a little. Spend time with family and friends. Stay out of the cold.

On the other hand, I believe it is a great Christmas message.

Christmas celebrates the birth of the man who ‘embraced the suck’ more than any individual ever. His whole purpose on earth was to suffer. He suffered for the benefit of all others.

Jesus told us to pick up our cross and follow him.

Picking up your cross means embracing the suck.

What’s the alternative? Living a life of ease and leisure? Sitting on the couch watching movies. Popping pills for whatever ails you? Eating whatever you want?

You know where that leads. Aches and pains. Brain fog. Chronic disease. Lots of visits to the hospital. Nursing homes. In many cases an early death.

It’s not just the physical problems though. When you’re down and you pull yourself back up, you feel on top of the world. You remember that story for the rest of your life.

Pushing yourself and accomplishing a goal is what makes life worth living. The mental decline can be just as bad as the physical. Feeling unfulfilled can lead to lots of problems as well such as alcoholism, pornography, drug abuse etc.

So what does embracing the suck mean? It means finding what you don’t like in your life and doing something about it.

Are you fat? Diet and exercise. Poor? Start a business. Freelance. Hustle to make money (ethically and legally of course). Relationships not good? Resolve to be a better person. You can’t change others. Change yourself. Make yourself more attractive to others.

Maybe all those areas are good for you. You’ve been successful in life. And yet you may still feel unfulfilled. Then turn to charitable causes. Volunteer a lot of your time to the point of inconvenience. Don’t just go to a charity food packing night, take a selfie, and put the picture on social media to virtue signal.

Spend some serious time with homeless people. Or at an assisted living facility. Or some other charitable cause.

When you hesitate, tell yourself “embrace the suck”.

And do it anonymously. Do it because it sucks. It’s frustrating. It’s tiring.  Don’t hate it while you’re doing it. Embrace it. Be excited you have the opportunity. Actually look forward to it.

I bet you’ll find both your mental and physical health will be better because of it.